Meet Sofia Sandhu, an ordinary small town girl doing extraordinary things in life. Sofia is a scientist and currently pursuing her post-doc from the University of Glasgow, Scotland. She is one of the shining examples of talented and driven women in the world of science and technology, who is very self-aware and willing to take risks in her life.
Despite being born and brought up in a small village of Haryana, Sofia refuses to give in to the social pressures and continues to follow her dreams.
How would you describe yourself
If I have to describe myself in one line, then I would say, I am a person who speaks very less and tries to listen more.
Ever since I was a young girl, I had this curiosity of knowing how’s and why’s of everything. In my 6th grade, I read about Marie Curie and I got so fascinated with her story that I started visualizing myself as a scientist working in a lab. My passion for science started that time only.
But I was never able to get very good grades in school, Reason? Well, I am not the person who can learn what is in front. I need to go deeper to understand things from the core level. Hence, always an average student. Despite of this, I never felt discouraged and didn’t let my curiosity to understand science die.
I took baby steps to reach where I am today and it was not easy as I am from a village, my mother is a housewife, father is a retired schoolteacher (He is an international athlete too) and I have three sisters and a brother. But the support I get from my family is infinite.
What do you like about yourself the most?
Everything! I admire every single flaw of mine. They make me human. Sometimes, I wonder how we experience different feelings. For example, what if we never experience sad moments? Will we ever be able to even know what happiness is? This way I end up liking myself more.
What makes you happy?
One thing that fills my heart with immense happiness is when I see my family sitting together laughing hard and cherishing life. Also, I just get happy by ticking off everyday tasks. It’s kind of weird but it gives me a sense of accomplishment.
What drives you crazy ?
When someone doesn’t respect my time. Ahhhh! I just loose self-control.
What’s the biggest risk you have taken in your life?
Not getting married and sticking to building my career. It may sound absurd, but I am from a place where most of the girls get married by the age of 25. Seeing your friends or girls around you getting married and having kids sometimes make me doubt my decisions. What if I fail! People will laugh at me! I doubt my potential. But I am learner. I want to learn as much as I can do. And this feeling to learn and grow helps me to stay positive in life.
Did you ever face a time when you really struggled?
Yeah, it happened in 3rd year of my PhD. I kind of faced a toxic environment with my lab-mates and it took a toll on my mental health. Going to the lab and immersed in research is something I enjoy the most. But due to the toxicity I struggled very hard to even get up from the bed. I used to breakdown every other morning during that time. It really took me 2 years to come out of that state.
To anybody out there facing toxic relationships at workplace, please please set your boundaries with people. Never allow anybody to hurt you that much.
Would you have done anything differently in terms of your career or personal life if you knew what you know now?
Honestly, No! Every single incident or moment, good or bad, has made me a better person professionally as well as personally. From starting my education in a very small school of my village using a takhti kalam to University of Glasgow, working with one of the best teams in the world, this is the journey I respect most.
What are the best and worst decisions you think you've made?
Best few and worst many. The best decision I have ever made is to never give up on my dreams. I just decided one day that I won’t get married until I achieve my goals, as I feel relationships demand a lot of time and drains out energy from you. Especially, it is expected from women to invest a lot of time to take care of things at home and not from men. I don’t want to give up so easily. Thankfully, my parents support me to build a beautiful life for myself.
Coming to the worst decision, I cut off many people without telling them the reason. I thought they won’t understand me…, so why to waste energy. People usually expect that the fate of a woman is just ending up getting married and having kids. Even when I was looking for post doc positions people believed that I won’t succeed and will get married.
Did you ever feel left behind because of your gender?
Yes! The bitter truth of this patriarchal world. Why the hell men are always considered more efficient than women.
Who’s been the inspiring female figure in your life?
My mom. She always wanted to study more and wanted to work. Then life happened and she had no choice but to give up. She inculcated in me the power of self-love and taking a stand for yourself. She is a woman of her principles. I want to be like her - a graceful fighter
What's the best advice you have ever received?
I will share two most important advices with you.
It was when I was about to start my college life. It’s been passed to my father by my great grandfather. And he passed on to us. And now I am sharing this with you all:
He said, "I won’t mind if you fail in exams. I even don’t want you to score 100% in any subject. I will be happy if you score less. This way you will try harder to learn more. Secondly, college life is not about studies. Learn how to dress up decently in public, how to eat and how to walk.”
Second one, I read in a novel. It changed my perspective:
“Why grass is green? The simple answer is - grass absorbs every colour of light except green. So, green is reflected back, and we say it’s green. But let us look from another perspective. We could also say grass is every colour except green. Will it be wrong? Nope!
Thus, it implies that while judging anyone in life just try to see things from a different perspective.”
What advice do you have for other women or young girls
To every woman out there, do not ever give up on your dreams. You can achieve anything…literally anything. All you have to do is just believe in yourself. The world will be mean to you at various stages, and you will feel demoralized & defeated, but just get a hold on yourself, have faith and keep going. You are gifted with this amazing thing called life and no one knows what happens when life ends. So, just live your life to the fullest.
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